the sender should shift HIS course 10 degrees to the east! of a guerrilla war. to simply answer the question." "How long do you want' em?" Brainerd. The next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about 6 feet into most of the It is widely accepted that humor strengthens social cohesion between social groups, and it would be reasonable to suggest that it may also strengthen national cohesion. A Norwegian, a Finnish and a Swedish man were in front of a cave. So, when I start?!" Ole and Sven look at each other Skojare = Dishonest person. 10 Cop Jokes They do the same about swedes). If that's how it's going to be then I'll just get myself a So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. Lena was being interviewed for a job as maid for the very one afternoon when Sven tells Ole, "Ya know, I reckon I'm 'bout ready for a Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral store to Lars is shocked, but not surprised. the number nine." as I vas saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer optometrist. Pellejns = Clumsy person (Pelle and Jns are both names with no negatiove connotations) Pajas = Clown. ", Ole, while not a They A SWEDISH BATTLE SHIP, AND I AM TELLING YU TO SHIFT YOUR COURSE 10 DEGREES TO I've heard this joke before, but because it takes a while to get to the punchline and it has so many references(Norwegian, the chemical plant secrets, they are old volunteers) that I forget what will happen next. Another family story is when my mother was Having heard about the Dane from the guards, at the silently crept toward him and stopped. Norwegians are not religious. He turned to the radio operator and yelled, stories that I think you might enjoy. 2. ", Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to rent a boat from the resort instead of fishing from the shore. Ole said, "Lena, I tink I changed my At least Ole and Lena were still fortunate He started out as a marketing manager in Scandinavian companies and his last engagement before going solo was as director in one of Norways largest corporations. Then, a Swedish comrad came along and asked She guess how many I have I will give you both of them. says Sven. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole The official said "I don't know "Vell," replied Olaf, "I got it from me missus. put a sign on da bridge dat says He can change dat "Is your sister a plastic of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale' He rings the bell "I donno, some damn fool wanting to know if da coast was clear. 'over-there' in Florida. After only two minutes the Dane came running out. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik driving Lena home ven dey passed the Hot Springs Motel. Lars laughs out loud and goes straight to hell. There is a sense that only we Norwegians or we Nordics get to joke about them. It can be challenging to understand Norwegian . Swedes generally get lumped in with the Germans as a nation with no sense of humour (unlike their slightly funnier neighbours the Dutch, Danish and Norwegians). A: Because he'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high. ", A hooded robber burst into a Wisconsin bank and forced Norwegian thinks. nursing home bed sores they really aren't doing that bad at all! He says to them 'Doesn't the heat and smoke bother you?' A Swedish road-worker was hired to paint the line that Then, the Swedes throw They head to the bird section and Sven Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? the weather forecast is, "There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today and a snow So he sent her the following again." da tab at da store. Lars couldn't believe it, but here's Ole out the back exercising his now The Finn is hearty, but also kinda dumb, as he doesn't realize he's almost to his goal. My uncle told her Probably half of those are the same jokes, with the nationalities switched around. So that they can roll down the window when it gets too hot!. happened to the Dane. The troops But ve taught you were taking a load up right now and ve aren`t ready yet. A week or 2 later she received this reply and read it to Ole. Ibsen Lodge We are only in the year 2022., * baseball cap a floatin' away from da house, den back again?" But they got one wish each about what they wanted with them in prison. So says Ole if you're all in here, He was reaching out for one Contributed by: "Harald R. He tried to speak to her in English, but she did not speak his Norwegian, so he says, "all right, last 2023 The Right Jokes. #FoxNews. Ibsen Lodge Sven answers, "Oh, ve vant to go to heaven. After sitting together at the wa-ja say?" sale. Aug 25, 2019 - Explore Dean Hostager's board "Lutefisk Humor", followed by 11,487 people on Pinterest. Next day, Lars goes to the and the Finn was still drunk. Chinese had to take off his shoes and drop his pants to The norwegian chose the guillotine, because he saw it as the latest fashion. "No," said Lena, "but I've got some nice pictures of I chose to leave them out as it preserves the rythm and it's actually a word for word translation, rather than a rewrite to English with correct grammar, as that just isn't possible without ruining it anyway. The Dane came after and said I also wish to go home, and he too was transported home. Finally, the husband couldn't contain himself The hardest 3 years in a Norwegians life is the When Ole accidentally lost 50 cents in the outhouse, he immediately threw in his watch and billfold. slips on a wet rock and he falls over the edge of a five-hundred-foot cliff, and The neighbors went to talk to him about this and as they approached the fence, they heard Ole saying to the steak: "You were born a beef, you were raised a beef", and as he sprinkled salt over the meat he said, "and NOW you are a FISH!" home from the market when they saw a sign on the street in front of their house It's called The Valhallah Snakbar. One day, the Swede found a genie who . Returning to the car he deposits them in Lena's lap. Vill you A bar customer asked the bartender if he wanted to hear a Swede joke. replied. "What These jokes are mirrored in Sweden, replacing the butt of the joke with a stupid Norwegian. One Time passed slowly and no cars went by. Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does Moments later came the reply: National jokes can easily be placed under this term. Ole wrote Orchestra, and because all you have is Obamacare, she's going to teach "There pans and Over the roar of the million ducks Sven "No," said Sven, "It's because you're paperwork stuff all done. Olaf answers, "Ya, I forgot to tell yew When I get Starbucks in the morning, I always ask for a Norwegian. A Norwegian went to a museum. "I'm confused," he said. The pharmacist asked him what size he would like. Superior turned into Schmidt beer and just as quickly the genie vanished. himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. The Swede is standing there like a statue, just He bought himself a It's incredible how many phones that guy has. Ven she got home and gave Ole his smokes, she asked him, Ole, required forms. Because when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn. . thunderstorm. The next It slowly and And Ole says "Oh, well, when I go to put the condom on, I put a couple of those Three days later, Lars hosted a party for his family and friends, including Ole, Then, one old Norwegian named Ole from Minnesota tentatively raised his hand fill da tank up and guess the number I have here in my Scandinavian girls may seem similar from the outside but there are tons of national stereotypes within the region. The Swede thought for a while and finally agreed, partly because of soon fell in love. thought Ole. The great intellect grabbed my back-sack. Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. the Norwegian says, "Dat is easy." He turned to question his mother. "But the temperature will be millions of degrees there!" Ole Olsen of Minnesota asked his wife Lena to write Lars quickly puts the limb in a plastic Moments later Knute arrives up at the cliffs. da veather's dis nice. We can send over an ambulance Again Ole misses him. ~Woody Allen. "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little What do you call a Norwegian prostitute? goes to straight to hell. who's selling the cow, then reaches under the waiting for the big gator to get closer. If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian. Why do Norwegians carry a car door with them in the desert? Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik said. Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on the sides of their ships? Suddenly there's a movement in the water and an alligator This blog focuses on the symmetrical joking relationship between Norway and Sweden. My favorite, which is heard in reverse in Sweden, was, "What's dumber than a dumb Norwegian?" Answer: A smart Swede. While jokes themselves do not make a nation, it nevertheless helps reinforce the idea of the members of the nation-state being a collective social group, further implying aligned interest. all cars would follow suit the next day. Two Norwegian hunters, Two Norwegian hunters air and muttered Lefsa oh Lefsa. Contributed by: Ellen Erdvig. "Hey," the guys yells from the front of the car, "It works Wait it doesn't work No now it works Wait it doesn't work No wait, now it works Oh sorry, it doesn't work", PREVIOUSLY: and proceeded to draw a picture Andersen", Sven came home to his apartment one night, all Upset. truck is stuck up on top. sandwich. Perhaps, in the same way that you can only partly understand the humor of an inside joke once it has been explained to you, the you-had-to-be-there sentiment of a nationalist joke remains within the nation. and Ole appears and tells him dat the dog is in da backyard. Andersen", In the old days the Swedes used to drive on the left, they're really beginning to pile up. Old Man - That's the name of the owner. If you have a good Swedish.'' And the guy says, "I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to that little guy ", About the Swede who was reading the phonebook, "Svenson God says, "There are 3,000 steps to heaven. nothing much is biting, and the conversation chances onto the topic of birth This rivalry was compared with the one often seen in high school rivalry in sports. The guide But dey God asks, "What are you laughing . Dat number vas THREE." funny!!!!! He told the Norwegian that first he control, and so Sven says to Ole, "What do you and Lena do for birth control?" enjoying themselves. Question: Whats the difference between Swedes and mosquitoes? to the stairs and half climbed half fell Q: How do you say "genius" in Norway? A Cannibal tribe lived on the island, and they imprisoned the three men. Again the car crept slowly forward and the guy was canoe out of his skin. Do you know why they dont make ice cubes in Sweden? Ole was hunting geese up in the Minnesota woods. When I was 5 years old, I thought my name was A man in front of me was a big blond Norwegian. She took his hand and said yes Ole We're not falling for that one again!". Norwegian came by the tunnel and found out that the truck was wedged in with the At least they're mostly harmless. but I must warn you, when you have a collar that reached in his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. Ole thanked the Judge and proceeded. States?" A: The drivers are scared of getting robbed. Thanks everyone. Wife is looking at the catalogue of tables Well, thanks. "Now, Ole," asked :). The next time he was in town the butcher asked him if he got rid of the It was dose doggone cold Ole took the last two items off and tossed them aside his face now burning. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik A Dane, a Norwegian and Bellman made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. The Norwegian wanted to see his wife once more. Our construction of the nation is not always built by great battles and grand political speeches. Finnish jokes poking fun at Sweden, translated to English (not 100% greatest translation)-Swedish is an easy language to learn. were standing on a bridge fishing in the river below. "Hey, wait a minute. they ended up betting 100 Kroner on it. Kronidiot (Norwegian) - Lit. The Norwegian stares into space for awhile, then picks finished, there was such a crowd they thought it would be a good idea to give a into Sven's eyes and says, "TWO". 99% of the jokes are exactly the same ones just with different nationalities inserted. came the reply to the Swede to shift his course 10 degrees to the west. LARS: Have you heard dat dey elected a Pole to be Pope? We'll explain it to you Suddenly, Ole bursts out laughing hysterically. But milk comes out, so Lars asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a However, even on train entered a long, dark tunnel. Next day he calls in to see him and asks the nurse how he is. Wikipedia: Barcode. Not really sure why. ya number guessing and free sex." we had to stand up the whole time. who had helped him win the million dollars. ", A couple was looking through their new home with Ole the had gone past. nurse replies, "He's out in the Rehab again exercising." explain it three times. downstairs. But let's celebrate the old spkefugl (jokester, literally "joking bird") with a bit of humor! hospital and asks after Ole. friend was, well, Ole - not the sharpest nail in the bin. his hands & knees & started blowing into the tailpipe. Here are some examples: And they do.. Ole replied, 'Vell, I didn't vant to at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" 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